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Who's Your Daddy
Original Air Date: December 8, 2007 AudioLink_2007_1208
Show Category: Family
Show Description: Did you see the case recently of the man who donated sperm 18 years ago to a lesbian couple and now they are expecting him to pay child support? All this because he gave a few presents and signed them dad over the years. Join the conversation, as we look at what it takes to be a father, and why I think the whole sperm donation "industry" should be shut down.



Allen's Legal Pad for
Who's Your Daddy

No good deed goes unpunished

Long Island doctor – donated sperm to resident – child born in 1989

He was married and wanted to be kind to resident who wanted a child

Friendly gesture – support her and her lesbian partner's desire to have children

They put nothing in writing – but agreed that he would have no parental rights according to court documents

Over the years, he made small gestures

Had name put on birth certificate as dad so child would know identity - who he is, where he came from

Sent presents and cards over the years – signed “Dad'

7 phone conversations in 15 years plus one brief meeting

Child moved to Oregon with two mommies

Now being sued for support – for college, etc.. - court ruled that he owes it

Based on his income, mom's earning capacity, and reported income of lesbian partner

Until teen turns 21 – help pay for college

Another story that shows just how cavalier we are about life

effort to make everyone feel good about themselves

Murky legalities of artificial insemination

Can't legally hold self out to be half a father and half not

PA – no intention at all – Carl Frampton

Andy Bathie outside London

Happening all over

1.) Should sperm donors have to pay child support?

2.) Should men donate sperm at all

I don't think so

Think it is harmful to the kids, places strain on couples of lesbians to perform in a way that they cannot, and if gonna be a man, be a man

Fatherhood involves a lot more than sperm – and even presence at conception

Not casual, cavalier, self-pleasure, genuine interest in someone else

Takes the beauty of creation of a new life from an act between a man and a woman

Moves it into the laboratory, creates unnatural and often harmful circumstances for a child, who has to figure out that dad was no more than a moment of self-pleasure in a vial, and forces child to grow up with all kinds of internalized self-doubts and fears – know half origins, whole part of self is a mystery

Recipient gets sympathy for wanting to have a child, donor gets anonymity maybe and no responsibility sometimes, but who thinks about the kids?

Kids born of these transactions – first wave coming of age now – late 80's and early 90's

Struggle emotionally – didn't ask for this – limitations and confusions

Silly to think that biological roots and connectedness won't matter to products of cryobanks services

Daydreaming of some relationship with a father – swings, hugs, smiles

Jealous of kids from broken families who at least knew who dads were

Overwhelming sense of emptiness – and sense that you are literally a freak – product of a vial of frozen sperm

Adoption is one thing

Artificial insemination, particularly anonymous is another altogether





Miscellaneous

Nassau County

Rigors of qualifying – hair loss, IQ, medical records, Tom Brady, hair texture, eye color, hobbies, handwriting analysis, 90% are college students

http://biturls.com/2007/sperm-donor-child-support/

http://abcnews.go.com/Nightline/Health/story?id=1982328&page=1&CMP=OTC-RSSFeeds0312


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