Let's be honest. I am grammatically retarded. This should not be a shock to anyone who reads this blog. I write like I talk. Spelling doesn't matter. And as long as it communicates the point, what difference does grammar make, right?

For the most part though it hasn't really cost me anything in life. Other than not winning the highest Yearbook award in the country for a beautifully designed and photographed, but very poorly worded and edited yearbook - <sarcasm>which I obviously am still very upset about</sarcasm> - I seem to do just fine being grammatically retarded (despite what my English teachers said would happen).

But being grammatically retarded has an upside. I make up words. This is both hilarious and awesome. But not only do these words get made up spontaneously in conversations, they also come with definitions.

In honor of "unfriend" being Oxford's 2009 word of the year, let's take a look at my words.

Ban^•chee - the word that started it all. I think CJ might have actually said it first. But I came up with the definition: an expression of great amount in noun form. For example: That hurt like a banchee. Or: I am driving faster than a banchee.

Scu^•ba Steve - sure I didn't make this word up. It comes to us from Big Daddy. But in my vernacular, it is used to describe an non-named person. If there is anything I am worse at than grammar, it is remembering names. Thus, people's name I can't remember are named Scuba-Steve.

Womb Dad^•dy - now this one is completley an Andy original. It defines a man who has kids, but who's mother (and to a lesser extent father) still does things for him that he should do on his own. Thus, he is a dad who never left the womb. Get it? This is the most popular word I have made up, and has entered some of my friend's vocabulary. This may be the thing I am most proud of in life.

But then there is Deb^•en^•oir - another Andy original. It defines the atmosphere and/or feeling in a area or group, but can't be outdoors. For example: the debenoir of that church wasn't very Baptist before, but it is now.

And frankly Debenoir should be the 2009 word of the year and I need your help. Allen and I discussed this on the air and I got made fun of pretty bad. Feelings were hurt. I cried myself to sleep. I am pretty sure someone, somewhere at the same time was clubbing baby seals.

Anyone can use words everyone else uses. It takes a genius to make their own words. I mean, I can use a light bulb, but Edison was the genius who created it, right?

So what I need you to do is go to www.allenhuntshow.com and vote in the poll for Debenoir as the 2009 word of the year.


(PS The strange pause in the middle of the conversation is me trying to answer
calls and argue with Allen at the same time)

Allen's youngest daughter - Little G - is going to college this week. So this past weekend we did a show where we took callers from college only (or recently graduated) and asked for 10 words or less on their advice for new college students.

Being 4 years out of college - and born almost within a day when Allen went to college - I of course had to share mine.



1.) Figure out what kind of student you are and be it
We all learn differently and we all are heading different places. If you are going to Law or Med School, grades are really important, so you better keep them up. If you are going into Business, grades aren't quite as important versus real world work experience / internships. Some people learn by reading: they should read all the assignments. Some people learn by writing: they should write all their papers. Some people learn from other people: they should go to all the classes.

I only studied for a handful of tests in college (mainly Greek). I failed most of them. I didn't read many of the assignments. I aced just about every paper I wrote. And I graduated with a low GPA (3.23 overall and 2.8 in my major). But I walked away as the top student of my major (not by GPA standards, but as awarded by the professors), and a great education. I learned a lot because I figured out what I needed to do and ignored the rest.

2.) Live it to the fullest and don't just worry about academia
As I blogged about two year ago, 4 years goes buy unbelievably fast. And unlike a lot of things in life, you never get the opportunity to do college again. Don't forget to have a blast. Go to football games and tailgate, take weekend trips with friends, run out for burgers and milkshakes and donuts at 2 am, play intramurals.

3.) If possible, build great relationships with the professor (not shared on the air)
I know going to large universities this might not be possible, but if it is, do it. These relationships are unbelievably valuable, both in giving insight into your life, and giving you a confidence that you can make it in the real world. If you can relate to your professors, you will be able to relate to your colleagues.

On top of that, professors are great for networking. I still get calls from Dick offering me jobs.

Well that's it. Enjoy the four years Little G.


Ohh and one more suggestion for just the guys out there

4.) Get some balls and treat women right
I could not get over in college how many of the guys just never asked anyone out. You will never have the opportunity to interact with that many single, attractive, like-minded women ever again. Don't waste that because of insecurity, and when you do get in a relationship: be a respectable man and treat her how she deserves.

I had a diversion this past week due to the Colgan air disaster, but my loyal readers were expecting an Andy beat down on Allen for his position on Bobby Knight and his position on Obama and Iran. I figured I would start with Bobby Knight - as the Iran one is infinitely more complicated and may in fact involve more than one post.

Disclaimer to start: I am from in Indiana - but I was never really a Indiana University fan. I agreed earlier this year to root for Indiana if a friend would root for Notre Dame at the Hawaii Bowl. She did, Notre Dame won, thus I am rooting for IU basketball this year for the first time ever. But beyond that, I am a Duke University fan, and have no dog in the IU fight.

With that said, Bobby Knight would be a fantastic addition to the University of Georgia Athletic Department.

What set me over the top with Allen's ridiculous stance on Bobby Knight was when he called Bobby Knight the anti-Christ (that and he had his stats wrong regarding Bobby Knight's career). Let's examine this ridiculous logic through picture form.




Now, this might be news to people outside of Georgia, but Mark Richt is a godly man who loves Jesus. This cannot be questioned! In fact, God loves Mark Richt so much, he predestinedly named the Gospel of Mark after him. I bet you didn't know that.



Now, Mark Richt is also a very mild manner, even tempered man, thus Mark Richt is the opposite of Bobby Knight.



Using simple and obvious logic, one then can deduce that Bobby Knight ≠ Jesus



Now we all know that I am a big fan of logic, so one would think I must bow down to the obviously correct stance that Allen holds.

But does Mark Richt in fact equal Jesus for the University of Georgia.

The way I see it, a major university coach has three responsibilities: 1.) Graduate his students, 2.) Produce competitively successful sports teams, and 3.) Set an example of good character.

When said coach achieves these three with perfection, they can then be defined the "Jesus" of their sports program.

The problem of course is that Mark Richt is (arguably) only good at one of these three things, where as Bobby Knight is (arguably) good at two of these things.

In 2008, the University of Georgia came in 63rd out of 65 in graduating their football players. 52% of their players fail to graduate college.

Worse yet, in basketball, 77% of their players fail to graduate college. Bobby Knight has a stellar record in graduating his players.

Beyond that, Mark Richt hasn't won jack squat yet as head coach of UGA. UGA fans are still riding the coat tails of Vince Dooley from the 80s. Where as Bobby Knight is the winningest NCAA Basketball coach ever (women's basketball doesn't count as basketball).

Sure, neither Mark or Bobby are Jesus, but is not Bobby closer than Mark?

Allen of course made the statement on air that he doesn't need his "kid's" coach to help him graduate because "his kid will graduate." But then I ask you, why do you need your "kid's" coach to develop his moral character?

UGA should hire Bobby Knight. If he is hired, I'll be at the first game with a special throwing chair with Allen's name on it.

I had the greatest middle school math teacher. His name was Mr. Panning. He was a great teacher. He was a great cross country coach. And especially at that point in my life - he was a great role model.

I remember sitting in Geometry my 8th grade year and numerous times hearing students (*cough* myself) saying, "when the heck am I going to need to know this in the real world."

More on that later...

We decided at last week's creative strategy meeting that one thing we wanted to do with the website was to "localize" it to the market we are in. So, for example, if someone from Tucson visits the website, the design reflects the fact we are on KQTH in Tucson. Or if in Fort Wayne, it reflects WOWO. You get the idea.

Pretty unique, huh? Problem is: this is not an easy thing to do.


Crazy I know. But what does this have to do with math?

Taking someone's lat/lon coordinates and figuring out what zipcode that coordinates to (and therefore what radio market) incorporates some crazy math. Mainly using the Great Circle Formula to determine proximity:


Take that formula, incorporate with a MySQL database schema, sort by distance from nearest to furthest, limit your results to 1 (the nearest) and bam! You've figured out figured out the radio market a web visitor is in.

I guess my punk-8th grade self has his answer 12 years later.

There was a lot I learned back then I never knew how I would use.

I think about the only web programming class I have ever taken was in 7th grade. And the only video editing class I ever took was in 8th grade. The only design class I took was Sophomore year of high school. All while I thought I was going to be a doctor or an attorney.

On top of that, my last math class was pre-calculus my Junior year of high school.

10 years later, and with out a single college class in any of those fields, I find those classes were a great foundation.

What do you think you are learning today that you will utilize 10 years down the road?

I know as I get older I have become less teachable. We become "experts." We think we know what we need to know and ignore the rest. But like 8th graders in math class, just because we can't foresee what we need down the road, it never hurts to learn new things.

As my Uncle once told me, "you are either learning or you are dying." It's your choice.

I spend way too much time analyzing my web stats...although it is apart of my job. Every once in a while, the results of these analyzations are quite interesting.

I found this one quite funny. Google thinks I was a star high school football player for Homestead. If you do a Google search for Homestead High School Fort Wayne Football - a picture of me at Talladega is the second one that comes up. Take that Mike Rhinehart!¹

Of course those who know me - especially in High School - will also find this quite hilarious as I am the least likely football player ever. I should thank Fort Wayne Attorney and City Council Member Mitch Harper who is also the Editor of Fort Wayne Observed for the honor since Google pulls the image from his site.

Also, the number 1 photo in that result, as well as the number 1 photo for the Google search Homestead High School is a photo I took my senior year of high school of the "painted guys" - I selected it as one of the front page photos of the yearbook.

So what's the lesson here to all you high school kids out there? Who cares if you actually are a high school football star, just work really hard on your Google ratings and one day you will be. ;)

Anyways, nothing serious with this post. It has been too long of a weekend for something serious. Just found it humorous and thought I'd share.

It's A Small World is by far the worst amusement ride in the history of all amusement rides. And I am pretty sure Al Gore designed it...

On May 24, 1956, Al Gore was 8 years old. He decided to take a break from inventing the internet and called up his good buddy Walt Disney. Walt Disney took a break from hating the Jews and decided to listen to Al Gore's idea.

Al's vision: design a ride to convince the world that it is smaller than it really is. Why? Because 50 years to the day - May 24, 2006 - Al Gore knew he would release the greatest powerpoint presentation ever called The Inconvenient Truth, and in order for the premise of the "movie" to be true, humans had to believe they were bigger than they really were.

A small world is to Global Warming like time is to Evolution. For Evolution to be true, it needs a lot of time (hence the reason the world keeps getting older and older¹). For Global Warming, we have to believe humans are actually of some real consequence of size when compared to the world. But it just isn't true...

The current world population is 6.6 billion people. The most dense city in terms of population is Manilla with 41,014 people per square kilometer. What does this mean? We can fit the entire world population in the state of Washington. Or maybe better put, humans only take up .108% of all the land on the globe, or .032% of the entire globe (including bodies of water).

Ok, but you say, Andy, who would want to live in Manilla. Fair enough, lets compare it to what I call the "good life." Fort Wayne, IN has a population density of 1,071 people per square kilometer. This means you can fit the the entire world population in the states west of the Mississippi plus Alabama, Mississippi, Tennessee, Georgia, South Carolina and Florida. Or better put, 4.114% of all the land on the globe, or 1.208% of the entire globe (including bodies of water).

Don't even get me started on the math when we switch from 2-dimensions percentages (area = people per square kilometer) verses 3-dimensional percentage (volume = people per cubic kilometer).

Now the question I pose: are we really as important and influential and in control of this world as we think?

Like I have said before, it isn't that I am against "global warming" per se, I am just skeptical. And despite what Walt Disney and Al Gore came up with, we don't live in a small world, we are just small people.²

Are you sitting down? Of course you are...who uses a computer standing up? Good, you are sitting down! I say this only because I want you prepared for the craziest train of thought in the history of thinking.

I was listening to a news report the other day about how February 29th was the lightest day for gynecologists because nobody wanted to have a baby and have to deal with a kid having a birthday once every four years. Just mentioning gynecologists always draws my mind to an ex-girlfriend's father (he was an gynecologist, don't get any weird ideas). That particular ex-girlfriends got me thinking about law school. Law school got me thinking about my friend Lissa. Lissa got me thinking about 3rd year law school students - or "3L" as they attempt to fool us non-law people - in particular and what it would be like if I had gone to law school. Being back in school, with the slight reminder daylight savings time changes this weekend which means it is spring time got me thinking about what I missed most about being in school. The exciting conclusion to Andy's crazy train of thought is...drum roll please...spring break!

Ohh how I miss spring break. I was in school for 17 years. In those 17 years I never once failed to take a vacation. I never once spent it in Fort Wayne. It was always a time to get out into the world with people I loved and forget about school (even though you always had stuff due right afterwards).

I am going to take a moment and reminisce about some of the great trips. There was Antigua with the family. Hawaii with Hillary. Mexicali with APU. Siesta Key with Laura. Denver with Emily.

The closest I ever came to not taking a spring break was senior year of college. Nothing was planned except to stay on campus at APU and shoot down to the OC for beach days. As it turned out, APU went to the NAIA Championship game and I convinced APU to pay for me to go to get video footage. So my roommate Taylor and I hopped in a car and drove from LA to Kansas City overnight and just barerly made it for tip off (Lucky for Erin, the cheerleaders got to take a plane).

The best spring break by far was when CJ and I went to Hilton Head senior year of high school. We went completely on our own and spent three days there - it was cold. When we exhausted everything to do when it was cold, we went to the library, MapQuest-ed directions to Sannibel Island in Florida (9 hours away) and drove to see Andrea. That trip was not only great because we were 18 and on our own being adventurous and stupid, but it still allows me to take take credit for their marriage.

The irony of course was that in the early years of spring breaks, we usually would vacation to Atlanta. But it isn't about the location. It is about the variety. The adventure. The build-up. The friends. The relationships. What would this world be like if we continued spring break into adulthood? We all would decided in January to go somewhere, and for two months get pumped about the times shared.

For that, I am envious of my 3L friends who get one last chance before hitting the real world. Enjoy your last spring break my friends - vacation will never be the same again.

Many times on the air Allen will refer to his high school with pride when he states that his High School Alma Mater are the national champions at football. Well it is my turn to offer pride in my high school. I was casually checking out Fort Wayne Observed today (it makes me feel connected to "home"), and amongst my parousing I came across that according to US News & World Report, my high school, Homestead High School, has been ranked as one of the top 505 public schools (top 3%) in the country.

There are many times in my life when I have had the privilege to reflect on how blessed I am to have been born in the United States of America. You don't work in AIDS villages in South Africa, or sleep in a bed 1/4 of mile from a bomb explosion in Jerusalem, or build orphanages in Honduras with out realizing that living in America is a blessing - one which wasn't earned, despite what most Americans seem to think.

But more and more recently, I have come to the realization that my school was a blessing I didn't earn either - and it was a blessing that prepared me for college and life more than I could have ever expected.

I often joked with my friends in college that my hardest year of college was my junior year of high school. And while it was a joke, there was some truth there. Taking 5 AP classes and being an editor on the yearbook was quite challenging. But the brilliance of Homestead was that it wasn't just about the bookwork - it was about a holistic approach to education.

I think back to Block (AP History & AP English combined) and think about the extreme amount of energy that had to have been put into that by Mr. Schmidt, Ms. Decalone, Mr. Teagarden, and Ms. Walker. They didn't just teach historical facts and grammar (which we all know I must have been asleep for the grammar part), but they taught us how to think, how to debate, how to process information, and how to interpret.

I think about Journalism and how truly grateful I am to Mr. Kuhn for not just the journalistic integrity he taught me, but the independence he gave to me to learn my own lessons. Who knew I would eventually use those lessons to produce a talk radio show on the largest news radio source in the South (and no I took no journalism classes in college).

I even think about Woodside Middle School (feeder for Homestead) where I did my first and only web programming class and my first and only video editing class with Mr. Gorman. These are two elements of my life where I have succeeded at GREATLY and they have pretty much enabled me to do that which I do now. Yet I had no collegiate education to show for these areas either.

Middle school was also important because it had Mr. Panning – a man that taught me more about life and provided a great example of what it was to be a man during a time when I desperately needed that (he was a great Math teacher and Cross Country coach too).

I even enjoy that when comparing a lot of the “Gold” rated schools to Homestead, it appears most are “privilege sections” of public schools (basically they are gifted-only academies in public school districts). Even that fact makes me proud that Homestead was truly integrated. I was in ALPHA (the gifted program of Southwest Allen) beginning in Kindergarten – yet I had gym with the star football player, I had photography with the crazy hippy where you wondered if she was on drugs, and I had biology and literature with kids who had very different theological and social outlooks. All this to say, I learned about life and how to interact with people different than me. It wasn’t a sheltered bubble of brainy kids isolated like those of "public academies", but rather a melting pot of experience and perspective.

I currently live in an suburb of Atlanta much like Southwest Allen…only about 10 times more wealthy and “yuppie”. Instead of Dick Freeland and Tom Kelly - you’d know who I am talking about if you lived in Southwest Allen - Usher, Jeff Foxworthy, John Smoltz, and the CEOs of Fortune-500 companies are my neighbors. What cracks me up about this area is how many private academies there are (I can count 6 within the same space as my old school district). Yet I still don’t think any of them do as good of a job of educating and preparing a holistic person better than Homestead did. I spoke at a local private academy's career day earlier this year and I reminded them of Mark Twain's quote, "I never let my schooling get in the way of my education." School is more than just books. Homestead got this; I am not sure most private schools do.

Ultimately, it is the teachers that I am most grateful for. I now have a lot of teacher friends, and I know how hard it is. I know how hard it is to deal with parents that think they know better or that their kid is more special than the rest. I know how hard it is to come up with lesson plans that not only educate but that are engaging. I know how hard it is to wake up at 6:30 just to be greeted at 7:30 by a lethargic class. But as all teachers know, it isn't about them. It is about the students. And from one student, simply put, thanks for everything.

Please note this article was originally written for my Newsvine Column so verbiage is slightly different.

We interviewed David Levy, the author of Love and Sex with Robots yesterday in London in preparation for a show we are doing this weekend roughly titled "Why We Get Married?" His prediction is that by 2050, Massachusetts will be the first state to legalize human-robot marriages.

This got me thinking about evolution (which I am sure has got Mykola floored). Now, I am not a total believer in evolution. This is not to say I don't think it could be true - I have no quarrels with the theory. I just don't think scientifically there is the evidence for Macro-evolution. But that is not really my point. My point is that if evolution is true, I think robots are going to be the end of human existence.

We usually think of the end of human existence with robots something a-la-Terminator or Matrix. There is a giant war between the robots and their creator, yet inferior humans. But robots are far too smart for that. They are going to take over the world more subtly.

In the interview, we started to talk about if a human-robot marriage will be able to have kids. Sure enough, David responded by saying that the robot will be designed to produce genetically similar mini-robots that will combine traits from the "natural human" and the robot. Thus making kids.

So here goes. In theory, all things being equal and morality set aside, I think humans will naturally want to have relationships with robots more than humans assuming you can't tell the difference between the way a robot looks/acts/talks/etc...when compared to a human. Why? Because life could be all about the human. Everybody could marry a supermodel or "Dr. McDreamy." The robot could cook and clean, etc...sex would be what you want, when you want, how you want, etc...You could have the number of kids you want, not what your spouse wants. You would have no in-laws. It is essentially one less person to "feed / house / pay for." Conversation would always be about what you want to talk about, and it can be as deep, intimate, or shallow as you would want. You could essentially create a life that is all about you.

Now, throw in that the robot can manufacture robot kids and then you have the start of an evolutionary process that essentially wipes out the human race. Sure there will be some that will hold on (I'd like to think I would be one of them), but sooner or later the robots will become the far superior race and with survival of the fittest kicking in, they will easily be the next step in the evolutionary chain.

Side notes:

1. I should state for the record that a.) I don't think human-robot relationships are a morally acceptable and valid form of intimate relationship, and b.) I don't believe that robots really will be the end of human existence. But it is interesting nevertheless.
2. P.S. You should really listen to the interview if you have 6 minutes. I think it is really interesting and, yes, I am the "Andy" they make fun of in the middle of the segment for not being able to find a girl.
   http://www.allenhuntshow.com/Home/play.php?FileURL=...

It has been a freakin' hot summer in Atlanta - they don't call it Hotlanta for nothing. Needless to say, I am glad I spent most of it at Kathy & Charlie's beach and at Molly's lake. But all this warmth got me thinking about Global Warming and why I think it is a bunch of crap!

Now before you label me a heart-less conservative that is just toting the Republican line: give me a second. I want to believe in Global Warming. I really do. I would love to believe that we have enough data to know that out of the millions and billions of years this earth has been in existence, the last 100 years of human interference through the use of fossil fuels and energy has created a global warming effect that could be stopped if we just changed our habits. But frankly, I just can't.

Remember Hurricane Katrina? Remember that Hurricane season and how bad it was? All the Global Warming people were crying at the top of their lunges that it was due to Global Warming. The next hurricane season came and they "predicted it was going to be worse because of Global Warming" - alas it was pretty week. But did anyone retract that statement: no. This hurricane season was even weaker.

But here is the real crux in the whole theory: the whole universe is getting hotter. Check out these two articles by National Geographic and Colorado University. According to these articles Mars and Venus are also getting hotter. So unless there are men and women consuming oil and other fuels on Mars and Venus, something else is at work here.

So here's my question; what sounds more plausible. A.) Our limited 100 years of data showing that the mere 6 billion people on this earth (which is relatively small given the surface area of the earth) has consumed enough oil and related products to drastically change the climate of a MASSIVE planet; or B.) the sun is getting hotter for some reason we don't know and raised the temperature of the earth a few degrees.

I am going with B. Al Gore can continue flying around on his private jet burning more fuel in one flight than most Americans do driving their car for an entire year telling us how the world is going to collapse due to our fossil fuel usage, but for me, I am going to blame it on the sun.