Andy's Blog

I think Capital One just made me the President of the United States. Take that John McCain - it's my week now sucker! I would like to thank my beautiful wife I don't have for her amazing support. My wonderful children I don't have for their letting me ignore them during the campaign. Of course I have to thank the big man, the only one James Dobson listens to, Karl Rove for all the great advice. God bless each of you, and God bless America.

Ok, that might be a bit far, but I seriously think George Washington is pissed.

Think about it. He took on the British. Forged the Patomic in freezing temperatures. Lead a new country in her infancy that in only 200 years grew to the superpower of the world. What is his reward for all this? He gets his face on every $1 bill.

It isn't just Washington though. Through out ages past, the only people that had their face on money were the rulers of the world. Queen Elizabeth. Caesar. Lincoln. And rightfully so.

But then some geniuses (*read self-indulged pricks*) in some (probably) New York marketing firm decided to take George and friend's glory from them when they realized Americans are self-centered and would love the ability to put their face on their money.

So sure enough, I saw an add during the Capital One Game with Michigan & Florida and knew I just had to go for it. After all, I am sure I am exactly the self-centered American those genius pricks were thinking of.

But I have to say I love it. Being the creative, pop-culture (*read loser*) person that I am, it is exactly how I want to pay for my Chick-Fil-A Chicken Sandwich. I don't even sign the back. If anybody questions if it is my card, I am like...uhh look at the front dude!

But what does this say about our culture? Is this just that we are creative people and want to express that when we spend money? Or is it deeper? Does this have larger implications? Does this mean we think we are more important than our leaders? Or maybe that our money (*read economy*), is more important than true leadership.

We want CEOs that make the most money, not lead the best companies. We want Presidents that help our economy the most, not lead our country to greatness. One might argue they are one in the same thing, but when push comes to shove, which do you want? I think Capital One's marketing shows, to quote Jerry McGuire, "show me the money."

While Washington might be pissed I stole his glory, I think he would be saddened to see how his country evolved in her greed.

But I guess the only solace George Washington can take is that even though I am on MY money, I am not on YOUR money. So he still wins. But if you want to kick Washington in the balls, just go ahead and put my face on your new Capital One credit card.

I love Corona commercials. But I have to tell you, they don't make me want to drink a beer. They make me want to travel to a beach, sit in a hammock, with my smoking-hot girlfriend/wife (which I don't have), and forget about all of the worlds problems.

I should state for the record that I am not anti-drinking. I see nothing wrong with adults using alcohol in moderation as long as they don't become addicted to it, and as long as it isn't a coping mechanism to escape the realities of life. Other than that, go to down. But I digress.

I love Brad Paisley's song Alcohol. Part of the chorus includes, "You've had some of the best times, you'll never remember with me...Alcohol." This is one of the most profound statements in all of country music (I know, that's not really saying much).

It is this statement that ultimately brings me to the reason why Corona doesn't make me want to drink but to go sit on a beach. Living life to the fullest takes remembering what you have done and enjoying every second of it in complete enrapture of the moment.

I have sat on many beaches like those in the Corona commercials: Antigua, Honduras, Hawaii, Australia just to name a few. I can still feel the warmth of the setting sun over Honduras. I can still see the blue-ness of the water in Antigua. And it wasn't just nature that makes these memories fond in my heart. It was the state of my being in these memories. I wasn't stressed. I wasn't worried. I was at peace with me in the world. And no buzz or alcohol can create a beach moment better than that.