As promised on the show on Sunday (sorry it took me so long), here is the column written by a British helicopter pilot regarding his change of sexuality. Very interesting reading.

My script is not allowing a usual click-through link so you will have to copy and paste for yourself. Sorry.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/men/article6990013.ece

I found two comments particularly provocative.

First he says,

Some will dismiss it as heresy. I have long argued that homosexuality is natural but abnormal, to a torrent of hostility from gay friends who refuse to acknowledge that what you are and what stake you hold in society are not the same.

And then later
Loving your own sex occurs in nature, without artificial triggers. But it is still not average behaviour. Homosexuality is an aberration; a natural aberration. Gays are a minority and minorities, though sometimes vocal, do not hold sway.
But two decades of cavorting with my own sex has delivered little that is memorable, except one super-sized sexless friendship with the aforementioned ex-boyf, with whom I spent a decade of my life; numerous hours of internet dating; a dizzying number of casual couplings and a few trips to genitourinary medicine clinics.


This got me to thinking, given the recent study I saw that showed about 10% of gay men and 20% of lesbians say that they chose to be homosexual. This is an odd phenomenon that gets little discussion in the news today but is worth studying and noodling.

Every man (and many women) need a strategy for staring temptation in the eyes and not giving in.

Here are the top 10 ways to do just that. 10 ways to help yourself say, "I just cannot go there."

10) Know your identity. Who you are. When you are at your best. As a person of faith, it is helpful to remember, "I am baptized." I belong to God.

9) Enjoy a Healthy sex life with your spouse – not just often, but one that satisfies your deep desire

8) Wear your wedding band - it is a physical and visible reminder to yourself that you made a vow

7)Remember the old quote from Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward. "Why would I eat chopped steak when I have filet mignon waiting at home."

6) Understand that marriage is a calling. God has called you to this relationship. It is not merely a contract you wrote. It is a covenant you entered.

5) Remember the goal - a lifetime of love. It is not about your happiness on any single day. It is about a life that you are building together.

4) Do not put yourself in those positions to be tempted - e.g., it may be that you consume no alcohol when you are travelling on the road, or you may have no computer in a private room of your houes. Avoid temptation in the first place; do not merely resist it.


3) Close your eyes and think of your children. Imagine the damage that your one act can and will do to their lives.

2)Know your enemy. He wants to make you live backwards. The backward of LIVE is EVIL. The threat is real. Only the foolish ignore the threat.

1) Know his goals. You will be tempted in your areas of weakness not your areas of strength. Know yourself and your own weak points. Then take steps to prevent temptation.

I receive lots of inquiries and emails from men about their secret and silent obsession with porn.

And I recently received an excellent little pamphlet from Mart de Haan about False Intimacy. It came an an insert with a prayer publication our family uses.

In glancing at it, I realized this thing has a lot of good wisdom for men. So I share freely what I received freely. Here are a few of his thoughts that I found helpful.

1) It is not just a men's issue.
Men are the primary users of porn but both men and women are hurt by it. Porn lessens our capacity to understand the real desire and need we all have to be respected and loved.

2) Porn consumes our capacity for intimacy
Seeing women as objects of self-centered pleasure dehumanizes them and blinds us to their personalities. Worse, it blurs the image of Go, which together we share. Men get preoccupied in a cycle of self-absorbed pleasure, regret, and shame.

3) Porn sets up a God-substitute in our hearts.
Men often succumb to the illusion that porn is the bread we need and want. Only to discover that it fails to satisfy the soul, and even destroys it.

4) Porn costs more than we think.
Self-centered pleasure lasts for a moment. Regrets can stalk us for a lifetime. Self-deception and misplaced affection damage the heart. They put distance between ourselves and others. They rob us of our conscience before God and our transparency with others.

5) The porn problem requires more than a casual response.
Those caught up in the grip of pornography cannot fix the problem simply by renewing their resolve. We need a sustained, thoughtful approach.

Mart suggests a resource for men you may find useful. It looks promising. Check it out for yourself here.

Great email regarding last night's discussion of sex in marriage and Relevant Church's 30 Day Sex Challenge in Tampa.

Last night I was listening to your show about the 30 day sex challenge for married couples. I could not find it on your website this morning and was hoping you could email the info.

My husband & I will be celebrating 30 years of marriage on Sept. 2 and I was going to give this to him as a gift.. Of course, he will probably have to be admitted to coronary care unit…..

You are so right about the church not addressing this issue. As Jesus followers and faithful church goers, I would also like to share this info with my Adult Fellowship Bible Class and with my pastor.

Since my Bible class as a group has been praying for our marriages, this might be a great idea for all of us to try….

Thanks again. I enjoy your show.
Kim

ANSWER:
Here is the web site with more info