Passed on from a friend. Thought my blogging partners would enjoy some holy humor from the world of science.

*HELL EXPLAINED BY A CHEMISTRY STUDENT*

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term.

*Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic(absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can
project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the
volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
breaks loose.


2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.


*So which is it?*


If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into
account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a
divine being.

*THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.*

Tremendous email volume in response to last night's show. I shared why Maryland's policy for sex offenders this Halloween is cruel and unusual punishment.

Last week, sex offenders received from the state of Maryland bright orange paper pumpkins. They say: "NO CANDY AT THIS RESIDENCE"

If we are going to let sex offenders out of prison, then we have to be prepared to give them a second chance. A chance at redemption, a chance to start over. Without the prospect of being hounded, badgered and humiliated each day for the rest of their lives. We do not do that to other felons.

If we are not going to give sex offenders a second chance of any kind, it is more humane to leave them in prison and throw away the key. Continual ridicule and shaming only lead to a greater chance they will misbehave again.

Not everyone agrees. Second chances for sex offenders are not easily given. Nor is mercy. Other felons? Sure. Sex offenders? No.

The most colorful email to date:

Well, allen, i said i would never listen to you again after the michael vick show,but i tuned you in tonight because i missed you and wanted to see if you were any different, boy! did i pick the wrong night! are you feeling sorry for the child molesters now? I can't believe you! Do you even have any idea what they do to a child? and what effect this has on an innocent child? what is wrong with you man????? Tell the parents of these children how we should treat them so good. i think maryland did a great thing, and if a person ever molested my child, they would pay forever, no matter what i had to do. What about the ones who kill these kids, set them free too?? are you crazy????? i tried to listen again, just can't do it, sorry allen but you are a sick man.. alberta

In response to this past week's shows on Christians voting for Obama and their reasoning, a listener emailed me a piece by Randy Alcorn, a thoughtful Christian writer.

Randy makes a compelling case for the fundamental value of life and the immorality of taking it. His piece demonstrates why the sanctity of life and abortion trump other issues for Christians. Definitely worth reading. And thank you, Amy, for sending it.

Read Randy's piece here.

Some of our shows this week have highlighted how Obama's strategy of attracting more Christian voters than Democrats traditionally have is working in significant, although not overwhelming, ways.

I asked for callers who voted for Bush in 2000 and/or 2004 but who are now planning to vote for Obama to share with me why they have made the change. What swayed them?

Enormous response from listeners like you!

Here is one of my favorite emails this week from "Don", who is a bit spelling-challenged so be patient.

None of you talking on your show just a few minutes ago are true Christans. Your Obama listeners casting their votes and justifying it to are not. And you are not. Here's why: Obama supports killing the fetus after birth (or failed abortion). Anyone who supports a candidate with that agenda cannot be a true Christian. You are not a true Christian because during the 10 minutes I listened to your show, you did not point out that fact. You are so concerned about a balanced show and hearing both sides, you fail. You should try another line of work. Ever think about being a lobbyist? How about an ambassador?
Don

To listen to the show, click here.

To vote in the poll, vote here.

Too often in prayer, we struggle with God. We beg. We pout. We demand. We expect God to perform like a magician or shower us with blessings like Santa Claus. We major in instant solutions and manipulative prayers.

In time, however, we begin to enter into a grace-filled releasing of our will and a flowing into the will of the Father. We learn to pray the words of Jesus in Gethsemane, "Not my will but yours be done." (Luke 22.39-46)

In that prayer, we have the very Son of God praying through his tears and not receiving what He asks.

In that prayer, we have the complete laying down of human will. Your will not mine, O God.

In that prayer we have the perfect flowing into the will of the Father.

Every major figure in the Bible struggled. Abraham, Moses, David, Mary, Paul. Even Jesus.

Part of prayer is letting go. A letting go with hope. Hope in God. Often we have to let go of our tiny vision in order to release what God has in store for us.

And often, that letting go means the death of my own will. Letting go of your will only happens over time, moment by moment as you face the ordinary decisions of home, family, and work. It only happens in time through prayer.

1) Learn to pray for self-emptying

2) Learn to pray for surrender with Jesus in the Garden

3) Learn the prayer of abandonment - "Father, I abandon myself into your hands."

4) Learn the prayer of release. Lift your children, your spouse, your friends, your future, your hopes, and your dreams into His loving arms.

5) learn the prayer of resurrection. "Lord, bring back to life what you want in me."

More help on prayer in challenging times.

Yesterday's help focused on the phrase in the Bible, used more than 100 times, "Be not afraid."

Today, a helpful reminder from the prayer of Jesus. Might be useful to remember how Jesus suggested we pray.

Our Father who art in heaven
God is our Father. We can trust Him. He loves us. He is also awesome and to be feared. But still we can trust Him.

Holy is your name
We honor God and revere Him for His holiness.

Your Kingdom come, Your will be done.
We pray for His will, not ours. That is crucial. We seek to align ourselves with God and His purposes. Prayer is not our wish list for Santa. We want to be in the will of the Creator.

On earth as it is in heaven.
We want earth to live in the will of God every bit as much as heaven does. Again, it is not our will or our wishes that we seek so much as it is to sit in the presence of God and be changed by Him.


Give us this day our daily bread.
We trust and depend on God. Not on our own resources. Not on the economy or the President. God is our help, our hope, and our Lord. And we seek His provision for today. Not for all time. He will provide for tomorrow when tomorrow comes. We will not worry about tomorrow. We ask for today.

And forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us.
God knows we have been selfish, and we have worried more about ourselves than anyone else. So we ask Him for forgiveness and we also ask for His strength to help us forgive other people who hurt us. We want forgiveness and we also need to be able to give it.

Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil.
God is our Father. We need His guidance and leadership. We want Him to direct our lives, not the President or the economy. God, keep my path straight.

And the Kingdom, the power and the glory all belong to God.
One final reminder of the One to whom we pray. It all belongs to Him. It is not about me. It is about Him. Prayer places us in the presence of the One who made us and loves us. It shifts your center of gravity from you to God.

And that is the goal. In a tough time, we remember who is as the center. God.

Since you and so many listeners asked for help with prayer in a stressful time, I am gonna do some blogs this week on this topic.

Will use a lot of Richard Foster's work, as mentioned in the previous blog. But today's is a simple reminder from Scripture.

Before the show on Saturday, I tried to count the number of times that the Bible uses the phrase: Fear not. Or Be not afraid. Or Do not fear.

I counted more than 100 times.
Jesus calms the storm and tells His disciples, "Be not afraid."
Gabriel appears to Mary and instructs her, "Be not afraid."
The angel appears to the shepherds and calms them, "Be not afraid."
God continually reminds David, "Be not afraid."

You get the picture. Faith leads to trust in God. Trust in God conquers fear. God's presence casts out fear.

I am meeting a lot of people who are fearful and anxious - about the economy, their savings, and the upcoming election. Faith overcomes fear.

A simple reminder from God: Be not afraid.

Tonight's show will include talking with you about praying. How to pray. Why pray. Praying in a time of economic stress and crisis.

For an excellent resource on prayer, I recommend
Prayer: Finding the Heart's True Home by Richard Foster.

Very simply, this is the best resource I have ever encountered on prayer. Helpful. Not condescending or self-righteous. Humble and grounded in deep faith.

I will blog some more this week to share some of the insights I have gathered from that book. So many of you have asked about praying during this unsettling time. I hope tonight's show, this resource and my blogs this coming week will help.

Great conversation on Sunday night about the growing trend of parents moving in with their adult kids.

Some for economic reasons. Some for health reasons. Some for convenience. But the 60% growth in this since 2000 is something few people are aware of. If you missed the show, listen here.

We touched a chord with this one. This trend brings joy, honor, and also challenges.

Hence, the real life and faith email of the week

Hey Allen,

I was driving while you were talking about taking in parents so I could not call. We took in my father in law 4 years ago. He has some resources but not enough to live in a commercial senior facility for very long. His second wife had died and he was alone and living across the country from us. He is now 91 and in good health overall with hearing and sight problems. He needed someplace to live and someone to cook for him, since it was harder and harder for him to see well enough to be safe in the kitchen. We have a big house and I felt that it was our duty to invite him to come here. Overall it has been OK for us. However, I feel that my husband's first loyalty and commitment is to his dad and not to me any longer. He is not willing to leave him at home alone to go anywhere with me. Our younger child is a sophomore in college and our older child married and on her own, but we are not free to travel, even for a weekend away or a day away locally, as my husband is afraid to leave his dad. "Dad" has very limited outside contact besides the two of us. He only goes to church, doctor's visits and the grocery store. He is not interested in going with the senior group from the church on outings, or anywhere except with us when we take him occasionally to a community event or performance and that is rare. I feel some resesntment building due to the the time and attention that my husband pays to his dad but not to me. He feels bad that his dad is here all day while we work, so he spends most evenings watching TV with his dad, which I do not enjoy, and there is little time left for me. Now we are committed to this arrangement I do not feel it can be changed. "Dad" helps out with our expenses, which is wonderful since my husband lost his primary job and is trying to rebuild his career. But I feel I have lost a lot in the relationship with my husband as a result of our decision. My brother in law, the only other child of "Dad," is not able to take him in due to many circumstances, not the least of which is the unsuiltability of his house (stairs being the principal obstacle). I have tried to talk to my husband about this, but he is not willing to acknowledge that problem. Any suggestions?

Thanks for "listening."

Debbie

And part of my response

Your struggle makes sense. You and your husband are doing the right thing, but it comes with a price/cost. In giving yourself over to "Dad", you are honoring your father and also teaching your own children the key virtues of integrity, love, and honor. At the same time, you are suffering some loss in your marital relationship.

This is not easy. However, I do think a few things can help. First would be to plan one weekend away per quarter. Once every 13 weeks where you ask the brother-in-law to come stay at your house for the weekend while you go away with your husband to visit kids or relax. That seems very reasonable and fair. Not excessive at all. Second would be to see a counselor at your church every so often just to give vent to your feelings and have someone to listen and offer encouragement and a little coaching. I would not envision this to be something that is weekly or anything but a once-in-a-while session just to release. You would enjoy it and be encouraged by it. Third would be to swallow some of your disappointment and begin doing random loving deeds for your husband whether he reciprocates or not. Every week or two, bring home something he really enjoys, a meal or a movie or something related to his hobbies. Just kind acts to express your love for him. Do not let distance set into your relationship. It will be hard to overcome later. Love him unconditionally so that he can begin to notice you in return. Your "Dad" will not be around forever, so it will be important for you and your husband to nourish your own relationship for the long haul.

I hope this helps. You are doing the right thing. Let's just find the way to do the right thing with minimum price paid and love lost.

Just received a card from my very thoughtful brother.

Until now, I was not aware that today is Bald and Free Day. A day to celebrate all that is baldness. The beauty. The brains. The best.

There appears to be some dispute as to whether Bald and Free Day is actually today or last Tuesday, October 7. Not to worry. Every day is Bald and Free Day for me.

My dad denied his baldness until the bitter end. So too with Joe "Baldin'" Biden and his plugs and his miracle gro. Not so with me.

My maternal grandfather was as bald as a cue ball by age 20. I never had a chance. But I am not bitter; I am bald.

I claim my baldness. I embrace it. Today I shall bask in my baldness.

And all thanks to my thoughtful brother, who is always thinking of others. He is a giver. A very hairy giver.

And I am bald...and free.